"During the Maithuna ritual the two partners sit facing each other, the man in full lotus posture (padmasana). The woman sits in his lap, wrapping her legs around his waist, lingam in yoni and her arms around his neck, in a state of ecstatic surrender. The couple remains motionless and prolongs the embrace so that the energetic exchange is passive and receptive rather than active and demanding. Nothing special is done to arouse the sexual energy: it just follows its natural flow, without being seized and exploited by the will. The mind and the senses rest in the action, effortlessly aware, the Serpent awakens and ascends toward the Divine embodied in both the woman and man, they become ‘that which is’ complete union in the now.”

so beautiful. I miss making love 

Paulo Bagunça e a Tropa Maldita - Olhos Risonhos



I kill myself over and over,
Ego has been slayed and annihilated.
I have crossed the border, and traversed the depths of insanity.
I have died hundreds of times.

For awhile it feels better. I begin to work through the trauma.
But ultimately it never matters.

I can be fine, and high functioning for as long as I am alone.

Every time I engage in an intimate relationship, or I bond intimately with another, I am reborn and I lose myself all over again. Hello three years old. Goodbye twenty years of life experience. I lose my sense of self. I become excessively dependent on another person to survive. I lose my identity. I lose my will to live, by allowing the person I am with to dictate and predominate my thoughts and feelings.

I sacrifice my entire life to make them happy, although I don’t want to be like this, and I know it is unhealthy, my desire to be loved and needed and wanted is that immense, I am willing to throw away everything I work for in order to achieve a semblance of fulfillment.

And knowing the other person never feels the same as I do? That is what kills me the most.

I bleed.
And bleed.
And bleed.

There is no respite.

They say balance and moderation is the key to a healthy life, but when one is unable to identify the middle ground or a dichotomy, one is essentially perpetually fucked.


insistir na dolência no agravo de não criar imagens vacilantes de dizer tudo ao contrário do que não se pensa pular a cerca para aumentar a distância binária entre um terreno e o outro: estava fora agora estou
insistir na mercadoria como via que salva
insistir na passagem que corta a montanha 
insistir na extensão infinita que atravessa os campos quando tudo na memória se resume ao regresso e que não podendo regressar deve o viajante cumprir o seu destino em linha recta: estava longe agora estou


Jessy Boy Dreid

I can’t tell my woman from the man
She is dressed in the same pollution
Her mind is confused with confusion
To my problem seems there’s never never no solution
I’ve become a night-life raver
And I’m begging you please don’t let me down
Night-life ravers, night-life raver
Please, please don’t let me down

(via psychodelic)


"The Ballad of Ryan, Anna, Josh & Dree", Dree Hemingway photographed by Bruce Weber for Vogue Italia September 2010